A change in routine

Our routine is about to have a little shake up.

Emma changes schools tomorrow – goes up to big school.

It’s a big moment in the house.

She’s changing from her beloved primary – with one form per year – a quiet, nurturing, small (but not too small) school into the next level up. 5 forms per year. It’s a lot of children and a lot of places for her to get lost/ misplace her school bag etc…

But more than this.

We no longer have to walk her there and pick her up.

Well, for the first week we do – helping them (and us) find their feet, get used to getting up earlier, going somewhere new, meeting different people, but after that… they’re on their own.

And so are we.

Emma’s pretty excited about this and she and her friends have planned, and re-planned, who is picking up who when.

But… I feel a little bereft.

Much as I complain about the daily grind of the school run, I will miss it.

It’s a time to talk to Emma, talk about how her day will be, or how her day has been. Or to talk about Minecraft if I’m really, really unlucky… But it is time together. She, Alex and I bobbing along together, first dropping Emma, then dropping Alex, then me circling home.
And that won’t happen any more. It’ll just be me and Alex. And it’ll be a whole lot quieter.

I love hanging just with Alex. Just him and me. Some quiet us time. But having Emma around when we’re out and about – and more on this another time – just ‘normalises’ life. Keeps you in the mainstream. And if Alex kicks and squeals in his wheelchair whilst we’re chatting, well, that’s simply what he does and we just ruffle his hair. It feels different when it’s just him and I… almost like I have to make more of an effort, to show to the world in a very obvious way that I don’t mind that he’s disabled. Which I don’t. Well, I do but I don’t :-) and when it’s just Alex and I… I feel a little more exposed.

Emma is our shield.

So, a little selfishly I know, I will miss my grown up companion on the school run – whilst also knowing it is time for change. I am both excited and nervous for her.

She is excited and nervous too. But I think she’s ready.

2015-05-30 14.15.37

Mummy, she’s ready, I’m ready – it’s just you!!

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